rms10: (Default)
Things here are going well. I'm not even going to bother listing the bad. (Well. I hope not. Provided nothing sets me off.)

1. The semester has started! I know I usually whine about this, and indeed I now have to fight for elevators, and I won't even bother going to Dominick's again until summertime. But it also means that lots of people are around -- including new postdocs and new grad students, which is exciting -- and there are lots of things going on.

2. Steelers! Yay!

3. I find myself identifying with and talking with the post-docs more than the young grad students. Maybe that's not all good, but I think it's a good sign that I'm comfortable talking about science with postdocs. After all, they will be my peers next year (aieee!).

4. Miss Manners was really awesome this week. I love it when rude people write in, convinced that they are right. Are they really that delusional? Or are those letters made up?

5. The eyebrow waxing didn't hurt nearly as much as I thought it would. It doesn't look all that different, although I suppose it is neater.

6. Work is going okay. And I think I broke the intrinsic float command in Fortran, which I'm oddly proud of.

7. Dude! I'm getting married a week from tomorrow! Aieee!

No monkey!

Oct. 21st, 2005 10:59 am
rms10: (Default)
I bought Miss Manners on Painfully Proper Weddings soon after getting engaged, and it was a breath of fresh air after glancing at The Knot. No pressure about finding the perfect hairstyle, or about registering soon for gifts, and don't even get me started about TheKnot's etiquette quiz. (For starters, the correct answer to question one should be, "C, Say nothing and hope for the best. People will give what they want to give." According to their answers, I only got 75% on their etiquette quiz, which is bullshit.)

Anyway. The Miss Manners book is going to be incredibly helpful for keeping things simple, and she has the best letter ever about, um, unwanted guests:
DEAR MISS MANNERS -- I know columnists receive gag letters, but believe me, this is not one! The parents of one of our daughter's bridesmaids have a monkey which they are training to help care for a paraplegic. They take the animal with them when they go out. They have threatened not to attend the wedding because we did not include the monkey on their invitation.

I do not feel that a monkey belongs at as solemn an occasion as a wedding. It chatters continually and bangs around its cage. Also, there will be children in attendance, and I fear they will be bitten. I think what they are doing is admirable, but is it unreasonable to ask them to leave the monkey in the care of others on this special day? My daughter does not want it, either, but is reluctant to press the point because she wants to continue to be friends with the daughter and will have to see the parents on occasion. How can we graciously let them know our concerns?

GENTLE READER -- Well, let's see. Miss Manners has been riffling through the files she keeps right behind her august forehead, and has not succeeded in finding anything under Monkeys, Undesirable as Guests. But let's do a bit of cross-file checkig here. How about the rule saying that wedding guests may not bring along their own, uninvited guests? That should take care of it.


All right, here's one under Animals, Working. It says that trained assistance animals, such as Seeing Eye dogs, may go anywhere their owners do. But this monkey is not yet trained and, not being in attendance on one of the guests, would be there in a social and not a working capacity.

You are quite right to suspect that monkeys who are solely out for a good time do not make ideals guests, althought Miss Manners wouldn't count on the children's not having a better time than they suspected possible. To inform the guests of your decision, you might adapt the general rule formed for excluding children -- "We are so sorry that we can't have your darling monkey, who would undoubtedly behave beautifully, but we feel we just can't make an exception because other people might want to bring theirs, who might not behave as well."

Hee! And no, the eeee!'s dog (our dog?) will not be at the wedding, and he will certainly not be the ring-bearer. It's alarming how many people have asked us that.

March 2013



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